04 – Dead Man’s Safe
Series: Roy Kaplan
Season: Out of Sight
Release Date: February 8, 2025
Episode Summary: Walter Knightsbridge has a problem. His father has recently died and willed a safe which contained an important secret. However, upon opening the safe, he finds the message has vanished. He asks Kaplan to help, but how is Kaplan supposed to find something when he doesn’t even know what he’s looking for?
PRODUCTION CREDITS:
ORIGINAL SCRIPT: Jesse Peng
EDITING and PRODUCTION: Jesse Peng
COVER ART: Jesse Peng
MUSIC: Beacon
VOICE CAST:
KAPLAN: Jesse Peng
WES: Caleb Jensen
WALTER: Trace McLaurin
TARA: Vanessa Benoit
FLETCHER: Mystic Waterz
OSWALD: Adrian “Tex” Silva
GARDA: Mike Castoro
PHONE: Rebecca Clifford
TRAIN: Rebecca Clifford
Special thanks to our $10/month Patreon subscriber, Jennifer Ford :)
03 – Bait and Stitch | Roy Kaplan Home | Out of Sight Home | 05 – Foul Spirits
OUT OF SIGHT: DEAD MAN’S SAFE
INTRO: It’s old time radio for a new time generation–it’s Roy Kaplan, Private Investigator!
(INTRO THEME.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) Kaplan speaking. You know, the private investigation scene isn’t always everything it’s cracked up to be. Sure, there’s excitement from time to time, but mostly you get calls from people with too much money wanting to know if their partner’s been cheating on them, and while that pays the bills, it’s not really the kind of work I enjoy. After a while, I start wondering if I shouldn’t go back to burglary just for my mental health. But then another good case rolls along and I remember why I switched all over again. Like this one from a while back, involving a family secret, a will, and a dead man’s safe…
(MUSIC TRANSITION.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) It was a slow Thursday afternoon, and I was at my apartment. Wes had gone out a while ago, off to do whatever it is they do when they’re not at home bothering me, and I was watching a program that wasn’t very interesting and didn’t seem like it would get there anytime soon. I was about to turn it off when the client called.
(KAPLAN’S RINGTONE.)
PHONE: (DIGITAL) Incoming video call.
KAPLAN: Oh?
(PICK UP CALL.)
KAPLAN: Kaplan speaking.
WALTER: (FILTER) Hello. You are Roy Kaplan, the private investigator?
KAPLAN: Sure. If you need something found or something found out, I’m the man for the job. What do you need?
WALTER: (FILTER) Oh, wonderful. My name is Walter Knightsbridge. You may know my father, Oswald Knightsbridge?
KAPLAN: Yeah, I’ve heard of him. Real rich guy who liked…old stuff, I think. If I recall, there was some incident between him and the historical institute a year or two ago.
WALTER: (FILTER) That’s correct. He was an avid collector of antiques from the twentieth and twenty-first century. It was his biggest passion.
KAPLAN: Was? Did something happen to him?
WALTER: (FILTER) Yes, sir. He died a week ago from a rare chronic bone disease. The doctors said he would live about ten years longer if he got an amputation, but he refused.
KAPLAN: Oh. I’m sorry for your loss. I’m still not sure why you called me, though. You seem very clear on the circumstances of his death.
WALTER: (FILTER) I’ve called to talk to you about his will.
KAPLAN: Go on.
WALTER: (FILTER) The will was read yesterday morning. Among the items willed to me was a key for a safe in Father’s study. He wrote that he had to confess some horrible secret and that he put it in that safe.
KAPLAN: Interesting. What was the secret?
WALTER: (FILTER) That’s just the thing. I don’t know. I opened the safe a few hours ago and it was empty! Someone must have stolen the contents, Mr. Kaplan.
KAPLAN: So you called a private investigator? Wouldn’t it be better to call the garda for something like this?
WALTER: (FILTER) Well, I would have, except that I don’t even know what was stolen–not what it looks like or what it contains. I was hoping someone like you who specialized in finding people and things might have better luck. I know it’s not much to go on, but I’m willing to pay a thousand credits to recover the information, whatever it is.
KAPLAN: Must mean a lot to you, to pay that much.
WALTER: (FILTER) They are Father’s last words. Surely, you understand. Even if it is something terrible, I must know what he wished to tell me. You will take the case, won’t you?
KAPLAN: Sure. There’s not a lot I won’t do for a thousand credits. Why don’t I stop by and take a look?
WALTER: (FILTER) Of course. Thank you, Mr. Kaplan. I’ll send you the address straightaway.
(MUSIC TRANSITION.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) Sure enough, Mr. Knightsbridge sent me an address. The place was as close to the city limits as someone could get without having to wear an environment suit, which meant it was worth somewhere in the neighborhood of five million credits. The estate was practically large enough to need a map, so Knightbridge sent a private shuttle to take me from the gates to the mansion proper.
(DRIVING.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) ‘Mansion’ really was the word for it. It was larger than my entire apartment complex and was built out of smooth white stones that were probably real granite, not concrete or geopolymer. No wonder Knightsbridge would spend a thousand credits on a little private investigator like me. A thousand credits for him was probably what a fish was for the aquaponics plant.
(DRIVING STOPS. CAR DOOR OPENS. FOOTSTEPS.)
WALTER: Mr. Kaplan! Thank you for coming on such short notice. I trust your ride was pleasant?
KAPLAN: A little long, but it was fine, thanks. So this monstrosity is your house?
WALTER: It is. Now that my father has passed, I am supposed to move to the master bedroom, but I am…reluctant to do so.
KAPLAN: Sure. I don’t like spending time around the dead, either. Where’s the safe?
WALTER: But Mr. Kaplan! You’ve only just arrived! Wouldn’t it be better if you took a break or ate something before you–
KAPLAN: You hired me to find a thief, dear. I’d like to look at the safe.
WALTER: Oh, I see. I…Well, in that case it would be right this way.
(FOOTSTEPS. DOOR OPENS.)
WALTER: Here it is, Mr. Kaplan. In the wall behind the desk.
KAPLAN: Hmm. Not very large, is it? Probably couldn’t even fit a loaf of bread.
WALTER: I believe my father only stored the message within it.
KAPLAN: Yeah, you wouldn’t need much space for that. Let me see what we’ve got…Looks like titanium alloy, no dents or anything…and if I remember this model, the lock is practically unbreakable. You’ve got the key with you?
WALTER: Why, yes. It’s right here.
KAPLAN: Open the safe for me, will you?
WALTER: Of course.
(SAFE BEEP. DEPRESSURIZING. SAFE DOOR OPENS.)
KAPLAN: A climate controlled safe, huh? Looks like your old man went all out. I don’t see any marks on the inside, either. That simplifies things.
WALTER: Why is that?
KAPLAN: It means nobody broke into the safe.
WALTER: What? But Mr. Kaplan, I told you someone must have stolen–
KAPLAN: I know you did. What I mean is, if I know my safes, and I do, nobody forced the lock. Even if someone used the best safe cracking tools on the market–or off the market, for that matter–they’d leave marks getting this monster open. Whoever stole your old man’s secret had a key. Is this the only copy?
WALTER: It is. I’m sure it is.
KAPLAN: Okay. Well, you said you got the key yesterday morning, and you didn’t open the safe until today. What did you do with it in between?
WALTER: I…think I left it in my room. I had to put it down so I could move some of Father’s belongings, and then I had to prepare for a party we were hosting. I was too busy all yesterday afternoon and night to check the safe. You…you don’t think someone from the party robbed the safe, do you?
KAPLAN: It’s possible, but I doubt it. Who else was at the reading of the will?
WALTER: The other beneficiaries–my stepmother and one of my father’s old friends, Moira Cairns. And the lawyer, of course.
KAPLAN: Naturally. Your stepmother and that friend. Were they at your party last night?
WALTER: Of course they were!
KAPLAN: I see. In that case, I think I’ll talk to your stepmother.
(MUSIC TRANSITION.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) Mr. Knightsbridge kindly showed me the way. His stepmother had a very large set of rooms all to herself on the second floor of the mansion, painted in silver and blue with artwork hanging from the walls. It was large enough to be a house all on its own and still have space left over. I was starting to get tired of all these rich people.
(DOOR KNOCKING.)
KAPLAN: Mrs. Knightsbridge? (BEAT) Maybe she didn’t hear me.
(DOOR OPENS. FOOTSTEPS.)
KAPLAN: Mrs. Knightsbridge? Are you here? My name’s Roy Kaplan. I’d like to speak with you.
TARA: (OFF) Just one moment! I’ll be right on down!
KAPLAN: (V.O.) I waited for a bit, but she seemed to be taking her time, so I let myself into what appeared to be some sort of parlor. It was a very modern looking thing, with lots of white walls and carpet that were probably very difficult to keep clean, and silver sculptures that didn’t seem to be of anything in particular unless you squinted and turned your head to the side a little first. I was looking at an odd cylindrical vase on the countertop when Mrs. Knightsbridge finally arrived.
(FOOTSTEPS.)
TARA: Hello. I’m sorry to keep you waiting. You said you’re Roy Kaplan?
KAPLAN: That would be me. How do you do, Mrs. Knightsbridge?
TARA: Oh, there’s no need for such formality. Call me Tara. All my friends do.
KAPLAN: Tara, then. I was looking at your vase here, I couldn’t help but notice it has no bottom. What is it made of? It looks like wax.
TARA: Oh, that. Oh, it’s made of some kind of plastic, I think. It’s not really a vase, of course, but it works well to hold silk flowers. Let’s leave that aside. I’m sure you didn’t come to ask me about my flowers.
KAPLAN: No, I’m actually asking about a robbery. Your stepson told me that your husband’s will was read yesterday morning.
TARA: Yes, that’s correct. Why? Has something happened?
KAPLAN: Well, if you recall, your husband willed the key to a safe to your stepson and said there was some sort of confession inside. But when your stepson opened the safe, there was nothing inside.
TARA: How horrible! What happened?
KAPLAN: Your stepson believes someone stole it, and asked me to find out more. If you don’t mind me asking, how many people knew about your husband’s will?
TARA: Only his lawyer. And then, when it was read, Walter, Moira, and me.
KAPLAN: Yeah, that sounds about right. Do you know what confession could possibly have been in that safe?
TARA: Of course not. The very idea that Oswald would have something horrible to confess is preposterous!
KAPLAN: Well, it wasn’t necessarily a confession about himself. Are you sure you don’t have any idea, Mrs. Knightsbridge? He didn’t talk to you about anything at all?
TARA: We, ah. We didn’t speak very often, unfortunately. Oswald was very…passionate about his antiques. He spent very little time talking to people or working on anything else. Oh, I’m sorry I couldn’t be of more assistance. It’s so horrible that someone would steal from Oswald. You’ll let me know if you learn anything about this theft, won’t you, Roy?
KAPLAN: Sure, sure. Thanks for the assistance. I’ll show myself out.
(MUSIC TRANSITION.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) After that less than useful conversation, I called Knightsbridge the younger and asked him where I could find Moira Cairns. She lived nearby, but not on the estate, which put her out of comfortable walking distance, but Knightsbridge went ahead and sent another shuttle to take me there. I supposed there were a few benefits to having a bank account so stuffed the government wouldn’t let you fill it anymore.
(DRIVING.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) The only three people who could possibly know about and open the safe were Walter, his stepmother, and Moira Cairns, so I figured that since the first two hadn’t given me anything of substance, Moira Cairns would. Then, as I came up to the house, I saw the homicide shuttle and realized I could never be so lucky.
(DOORBELL. DOOR OPENS.)
KAPLAN: Hello, Inspector Fletcher. Fine day we’re having.
FLETCHER: Kaplan. What the hell are you doing here?
KAPLAN: That’s no way to greet an old friend. I saw your prowl car outside and thought I’d stop in and see how you were doing. How are you?
FLETCHER: Busy. Get out of here.
KAPLAN: But I’ve only just arrived! I go to all this trouble to see you and you want to throw me out on my ear? I thought we meant something to each other.
FLETCHER: We were never friends and I’ll do a whole lot worse than throw you out if you don’t tell me why you’re trying to walk in on my crime scene again.
KAPLAN: I never meant to go on your crime scene. I wanted to talk to Moira Cairns. Preferably alive, but I suppose that ship has sailed.
FLETCHER: Why did you want to talk to Cairns? If you know something about her murder, you’d better spit it out, or I’ll send you to the boys at the station all tied up with a silk bow.
KAPLAN: Fletcher, you know I’d never hide evidence from you. I’m such a law-abiding citizen, don’t you know?
FLETCHER: Spit it out, Kaplan. Why are you here?
KAPLAN: I thought Cairns might know something about a theft.
FLETCHER: A theft? I swear, if you’re up to your old tricks again–
KAPLAN: I would never! No, I’m on a case. Someone–not me!–stole something important and Cairns was one of my suspects.
FLETCHER: Was?
KAPLAN: Well, still is. Being dead doesn’t mean she didn’t do it and it doesn’t stop me asking her about it. If you’d let me in so I can talk to the victim, that’d be lovely.
FLETCHER: Oh, no you don’t. I’m not having any of your ghost mumbo-jumbo in here today. I’ve got a hard enough time dealing with murder without having to deal with you, too.
KAPLAN: But my ghost mumbo-jumbo’s been so useful before. Surely–
FLETCHER: Goodbye, Kaplan.
(DOOR SLAM.)
KAPLAN: (Sigh) No love lost there, huh? I guess I’ll figure something else out.
(FOOTSTEPS. RUSTLING OF BUSHES.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) The best part about being a burglar is that if you’re careful and good at your job, you can basically go wherever you want to, especially when people don’t want you to. And off the record, I am very good at burglary. It’s one of the many reasons why Fletcher hates my guts. I got in through an upstairs window, directly into Cairns’ bedroom.
(CLIMBING AND JUMPING. WINDOW SLIDES OPEN.)
KAPLAN: Oh, geez. What happened here?
KAPLAN: (V.O.) The room was a mess. Someone had gone through and turned it all upside-down and inside-out, with all the drawers pulled out and thoroughly tossed. Anything with two transistors to rub together had been shut down and all the data chips that could be removed, had been. Anything that couldn’t have the data taken away had been smashed beyond recovery. Clearly, whoever had murdered Moira Cairns had needed to find something, or wanted to make sure that no one else did.
(FOOTSTEPS. DOOR OPENS.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) Fletcher and her boys were still downstairs, so I couldn’t go there. There was breaking into a building during an active investigation and then there was pushing my luck. That was fine. I could see from the landing that everything else in the house had gotten the same treatment as in the bedroom, and Moira Cairns, body or ghost, was nowhere to be seen. Unfortunate, but not unexpected. A lot of people don’t stick around after someone finds the body.
GARDA: Hey, did you hear something?
KAPLAN: Hm. Time to go.
(RUNNING. DOOR OPENING AND CLOSING.)
GARDA: (OFF) Get back here!
KAPLAN: (V.O.) I got my ass out of there. If Fletcher caught me, she really was going to arrest me again.
(MUSIC TRANSITION.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) So after that went about as well as could be expected, I went back home. Zero for three isn’t a good look, but I’ve done fine in worse situations. When things go bad, the best place to go looking is back at the start–that’s what Wes always likes to tell me, anyways. So I decided to read through the extremely long and dry will of one Oswald Knightsbridge.
WES: Oh, you’re back. Did you get another case?
KAPLAN: Hello, Wes. Good evening to you, too. I’m fine, thanks for asking.
WES: I just asked a question. No need to get sore about it.
KAPLAN: Yes, I got a case. A rich guy wants me to find something that was stolen from his old man’s safe. It’s supposed to be some kind of horrible confession, and I already looked into the two main suspects without finding anything useful. So now I’m trying to see if there’s anything helpful written in the late old Knightsbridge’s will.
WES: Have you found anything helpful?
KAPLAN: No. Absolutely nothing. For all I know, the safe never had any data in it and this is all Oswald’s idea of a very funny joke. Except one of my two suspects got murdered before I could talk to her. That’s probably not a coincidence.
WES: With that timing? I wouldn’t think so. Either that safe really had some kind of confession in it, or someone thought it did.
KAPLAN: Whatever it is, it’s important. I think I might need to talk to Knightsbridge the younger again.
(KAPLAN’S RINGTONE.)
PHONE: (DIGITAL) Incoming video call.
KAPLAN: Speak of the devil.
(PICK UP CALL.)
KAPLAN: Hey, Knightsbridge.
WALTER: (FILTER) Mr. Kaplan! I’m so glad to see you. I hope I didn’t wake you.
KAPLAN: No, I was about to call you anyways. What’s going on? And, um. What’s all that stuff you got behind you?
WALTER: (FILTER) Oh, this? I decided to sort through the things my father left me.
KAPLAN: Right. All of the antiques. I remember–it was kind of a long list. And he wanted you to keep them all in working condition? That’s a lot to ask.
WALTER: (FILTER) Yes, but my father cared very deeply about his antiques. Old technology was practically his only passion in life.
KAPLAN: Well, if it made him happy. What did you call for? Did something happen?
WALTER: (FILTER) No, I wanted to know how the investigation was going, is all. Have you made any progress on finding the message my father left?
KAPLAN: Not as much as I wanted to. I was hoping you could tell me a little more about your stepmother and her friend. Maybe about how they met your father?
WALTER: (FILTER) Them? Well, sure. It’s not a very exciting story, though. Moira and Tara were very good friends even before they met my father. They used to live in the inner city, but after Tara’s first husband died, she was so distraught that she moved in with Moira. They got a house in the outer city and lived together before Tara met my father.
KAPLAN: And where did Tara meet your father?
WALTER: (FILTER) It was at a museum exhibition, I think. Tara’s first husband was an art collector. I suppose she and my father connected over history–they both had a lot of interest in the early twenty-first century.
KAPLAN: Sure, why not? If you’re going to talk about history, you might as well talk about before everything went to shit. So then they got married?
WALTER: (FILTER) It wasn’t quite that fast, but yes. After a couple of years, they got married. I was about seven years old at the time.
KAPLAN: And did they get along?
WALTER: (FILTER) Well, they never really fought. They didn’t talk to each other very often at all after a few years, and you’ve already seen they have separate rooms. I think they’re both happier left to their own devices.
KAPLAN: Yeah, I kind of got that impression.
WALTER: (FILTER) Is there anything else you wanted to know?
KAPLAN: No, no. Not really, thanks. You can get back to your…antiques, I guess.
WALTER: (FILTER) They are really quaint, you know. I can see why my father enjoyed them so much. Look, see this one?
(CLATTERING OF MOVING OBJECTS.)
WALTER: (FILTER) This device is called a phonograph. My father used to play it for me when I was younger. It’s hand-cranked–no batteries or cables at all! It’s ingenious, the things people came up with before electricity.
KAPLAN: No, I’m…pretty sure electricity existed then.
WALTER: (FILTER) I haven’t been able to get this one to work, though. It’s supposed to make sounds when you turn the crank, but this one is silent. I don’t suppose it’s broken?
KAPLAN: Look, twentieth century technology isn’t really my wheelhouse, and–
WES: Of course it’s not working. There’s no cylinder.
KAPLAN: (BEAT) What?
WALTER: (FILTER) I said, I think something may have happened in transit–
KAPLAN: No, no, not you. Wes. What did you just say?
WES: That phonograph is empty. Of course it’s not going to work if there’s no cylinder on it. There’s nothing to play.
KAPLAN: And…what does a cylinder look like?
WES: It’s hollow, usually made out of wax or celluloid. There’s a thin groove that runs all the way around it that holds the sound. A lot of them are black, but they can be nearly any color.
(KAPLAN GETS UP.)
WALTER: (FILTER) Mr. Kaplan? Is everything all right?
KAPLAN: I’m coming over to the mansion right now. Make sure your stepmother doesn’t leave the house.
WALTER: (FILTER) What? At this hour? I don’t understand–
KAPLAN: Trust me, Knightsbridge. I’ll explain once I get there.
(END CALL.)
WES: You’re leaving?
KAPLAN: Yeah. I think I’ve figured it out. All of it. You’re a lifesaver, Wes. If you weren’t dead and a ghost and a complete pain in the ass, I’d kiss you right now.
WES: You flatter me. Go do your job, Roy.
KAPLAN: I will.
(HURRIED FOOTSTEPS. DOOR OPENING. PHONE SOUNDS.)
KAPLAN: Call Ainsley Fletcher.
PHONE: (DIGITAL) Dialing.
(DIALING TONE.)
FLETCHER: (FILTER) Hello, you’ve reached the Garda station. Inspector Fletcher speaking.
KAPLAN: Fletcher, it’s Kaplan.
FLETCHER: (FILTER) Kaplan. You’d better have a damn good reason for calling me past eleven. Especially when you broke into my crime scene after I explicitly told you not to.
KAPLAN: You can’t prove that.
FLETCHER: (FILTER) Oh, you’ll find that I absolutely can, and if you don’t explain why you’re calling this late in the next fifteen seconds, I’m going to come over there and arrest you for obstructing an investigation.
KAPLAN: But Fletcher, that would be abusing your power! We wouldn’t want that. Don’t worry, I’m not causing problems this time, I’m going to solve one of them. You know that Cairns murder today? How was she killed?
FLETCHER: (FILTER) Why do you need to know?
KAPLAN: I’ve got a hunch, just go with it. It’s not like you’re telling me anything that won’t be released to the public tomorrow morning.
FLETCHER: (FILTER) Someone snapped her neck. I’ll spare you the details.
KAPLAN: Oh, lovely. And out of curiosity, did you find anything useful from investigating her house?
FLETCHER: (FILTER) No. Only glove prints, and you of all people should know how useful those are on their own. Whoever killed Cairns knew what they were doing.
KAPLAN: Oh, I bet she did. Look, glove prints will be enough. You need to get to the Knightsbridge mansion and check the safe in Oswald Knightsbridge’s office. If you see his son, Walter, tell him I sent you and he’ll show you. I’m giving it 90-10 odds that you’ll find matching prints on that safe.
(MONORAIL PULLING INTO STATION.)
FLETCHER: (FILTER) What is this all about? What do you know?
KAPLAN: I’ll explain later, I’m getting on the monorail now. Just trust me!
FLETCHER: (FILTER) Kaplan, get back here! Don’t you dare end the–
(END CALL.)
TRAIN: (DIGITAL) Doors closing.
TRAIN DOORS CLOSE.
KAPLAN: (V.O.) Fletcher would make me pay for that one later, but I had a lot of research to do and not a lot of time. Between the monorail and the shuttle, it’d take forty minutes to get to the Knightsbridge house, and I had to hope that wasn’t too late…
(MUSIC TRANSITION.)
(OBJECTS BEING MOVED AROUND. RUMMAGING THROUGH SUITCASE. HIGH HEELED FOOTSTEPS.)
TARA: –should be good. If I call Rick, I can get back into the inner city and get my funds transfered and my documents fixed, and then I’ll never have to see this horrible place again in my–
(DOOR OPENS.)
KAPLAN: Going somewhere?
TARA: Roy? What are you doing here?
KAPLAN: Bringing you in as a murder suspect. Inspector Fletcher and her boys are downstairs checking your late husband’s safe right now.
TARA: Murder? How dare you! My husband died from a disease!
KAPLAN: And Moira Cairns died from a broken neck. Just like your first husband, funnily enough.
TARA: What are you trying to say?
KAPLAN: I don’t know, I thought I was being pretty obvious when I said I was bringing you in as a murder suspect.
TARA: You have no grounds for such an accusation.
KAPLAN: Are you sure? Because I think I can tell you exactly what happened last night: yesterday, you, Moira, and Walter all were present for the reading of your late husband’s will. In it, Oswald stated there was some sort of confession of a horrible secret that he had placed within a safe for Walter to see. You heard this and panicked, because you have a horrible secret that you can’t let Walter know.
TARA: If it was such a horrible secret, then how could Oswald possibly have known it? Believe me, we did not talk nearly enough to share all our sordid secrets.
KAPLAN: Your friend, Moira Cairns, sold you out. She told your husband, and he recorded a confession to be unburied after he died. Well, you couldn’t let that happen, so you stole Walter’s key and broke into the safe, only to find the data was already gone. Moira was the only other person who could have known about the data, so you went to her house to get it back. Whatever conversation you had with her didn’t go so well, seeing that you murdered her at the end of it, then went through her entire house and took out every single piece of data storage so your secret would stay safe.
TARA: You think I could do such a horrible thing to Moira? She was my best friend!
KAPLAN: Sure, if the secret was the murder of your first husband, Aaron Durand. His death got you enough money for you and Moira to move into a new house in the outer city together and put you up into the upper class so you could marry even richer. Obviously, I don’t know the details, but I’d speculate that you broke Aaron’s neck and Moira helped you fix the scene so it looked like an accident–you must have trusted each other implicitly, to have each other on the hook like that. If anything ever came out over that murder, everything you’ve ever accomplished in your life would have been gone in an instant.
TARA: This is slander, and I refuse to listen to it any longer. Get out of my house!
KAPLAN: Oh? But aren’t you curious to hear about the mistake you made?
TARA: A mistake? What are you talking about?
KAPLAN: Yes. With the data. You opened that safe and found an empty tube and assumed that someone had already stolen the contents. But Moira never touched that safe.
TARA: That’s impossible.
KAPLAN: That tube was the data. It was a phonograph cylinder–an extremely antiquated form of analog audio storage from the early 1900s that you never knew about because you never talked to your husband about his interests. Oswald must have thought nobody would recognize it except his son. He was right.
TARA: You mean–?
KAPLAN: Yeah. This plastic tube you ended up using to hold your silk flowers? This is the secret you went to so much trouble to find, and you had it the whole time.
(GUN CLICK.)
TARA: Hand it over, detective.
KAPLAN: What? Oh. A gun. That’s not even legal. How’d you get one?
TARA: You’re not leaving with that cylinder, and you’re not going to tell anyone about Moira, and you’re not going to tell anyone about Aaron, either.
KAPLAN: Or what, you’ll shoot me? You don’t want to do that. The garda are literally downstairs right now, you’d never get away with it.
TARA: Don’t try to talk your way out of this. The garda downstairs are just as big of a bluff as your bravado. Or do you really think you can take your chances against a bullet?
KAPLAN: If I don’t get this cylinder back to Walter, I don’t get paid.
TARA: I can pay you just as much. More. I have millions of credits–I can give you as much as you want. Just hand it to me.
KAPLAN: Hm. Tempting, but somehow I have doubts about your trustworthiness. I’ll pass.
TARA: Then die.
(GUNSHOTS. BRIEF STRUGGLE. DOOR BURSTS OPEN. TARA IS SUBDUED.)
FLETCHER: Down on the ground, now!
TARA: You can’t do this to me! You–argh!
FLETCHER: Tara Knightsbridge, you are under arrest for theft and the murder of Moira Cairns!
(BRIEF STRUGGLE. FOOTSTEPS.)
FLETCHER: Kaplan. We heard gunshots. Are you okay?
KAPLAN: Scared as hell, but I’m still in one piece. She didn’t hit me. Did you find what you were looking for?
FLETCHER: Yes. The glove prints matched, just like you said. Walter said you found the stolen data?
KAPLAN: Yeah. It’s this cylinder. I told Walter to bring his dad’s phonograph here.
FLETCHER: Knightsbridge put his secret on a phonograph? How in the bloody hell did you figure that one out?
KAPLAN: Oh, you know. My roommate knows a little bit about antiques. Probably wouldn’t have figured this out without them.
FLETCHER: I’ve been to your apartment. You don’t have a roommate.
KAPLAN: I don’t? Oh, right. I don’t.
(FOOTSTEPS.)
WALTER: I’m here! I brought the phonograph! Here it is.
KAPLAN: Lovely. Thank you, dear. Let’s put this cylinder on so I can go home and sleep.
(MECHANICAL SOUNDS.)
KAPLAN: This should be good. Go ahead and turn the crank.
(CRANK TURNING. CRACKLING NOISES.)
OSWALD: (FILTER) Hello, Walter. If you’re listening to this, that means that I have died, and that I have failed in my task. I am sorry. As I have told you before, I adopted you after your family suffered an accident at one of my exhibits. At the time, I had believed your other family members deceased and could not find any other family members who could take you in. I later learned through happenstance that you had a sister, three years older than you, who was fostered by another family at the time of the accident. Since then, I have attempted to find her, without success. I do not know if she is still using the same name that her parents had given her or if she is even alive now. I am truly sorry I never told you about this. I had hoped to tell you about her when I found her, so you could meet her. If you wish to search for her yourself, I have files in my desk which will be useful. And remember, Walter, you are truly my son, and I have always wanted you to be happy. I love you.
(RECORDING ENDS.)
WALTER: Dad…I love you, too.
KAPLAN: Well, isn’t that sweet?
TARA: That’s– That’s–
KAPLAN: Not what you were expecting, was it? Looks like Moira never sold you out after all. You killed her for nothing.
TARA: No! This can’t be true! I don’t deserve this!
KAPLAN: You murdered two innocent people. You got close to a third. I’m pretty sure that whatever you get, you’ve got coming.
FLETCHER: I’ll see you out, Mrs. Knightsbridge. We can talk more at the station.
(FOOTSTEPS. DOOR OPENS.)
FLETCHER: Kaplan? Thanks. But next time, when I tell you to stay out of my crime scene, I mean it. I will arrest you.
KAPLAN: You’d have to catch me, dear.
FLETCHER: Believe me, if I catch you, an arrest will only be the start of your problems. Don’t push your luck.
(FOOTSTEPS. DOOR CLOSES.)
KAPLAN: (V.O.) And with that, the case of the dead man’s safe came to a close. A murderer was arrested, what was lost was found, and Fletcher didn’t arrest me. There was an article about the whole affair on the telecast the next day–it was very impressive expose, and of course my name never got mentioned even once. Well, that’s okay. I got paid handsomely, and in this line of business, that’s really what matters. After that, it was a while before I had another interesting and profitable case, but that is a story for another time.
(ENDING THEME.)
KAPLAN: You’ve just heard Dead Man’s Safe, the fourth episode of Roy Kaplan: Out of Sight. Kaplan was played by Jesse Peng, Wes by Caleb Jensen. Our cast also includes: Trace McLaurin, Vanessa Benoit, Mystic Waterz, Adrian “Tex” Silva, Mike Castoro, and Rebecca Clifford.
Roy Kaplan is written, edited, and produced by Jesse Peng. Our music is composed by Beacon.
This show is brought to you by The Pinwheel Lab. If you like what you hear, you can find us over at roykaplanpod on Tumblr, or on thepinwheellab.com. If you really like what you hear, you can also support us on Patreon, where you can hear the next episode a little sooner than everyone else. All financial support goes to production, and helps make Season 2 more likely to happen.
What strange and supernatural mysteries await? Tune in next time to find out, and I’ll see you on the other side.
03 – Bait and Stitch | Roy Kaplan Home | Out of Sight Home | 05 – Foul Spirits